You can't forget your past
by cool chick 909
Summary: Emma is in year 10 at waterloo road after recently moving to the area with her dad. No one knows the full torture Emma has been through will anyone be able to help her ?
1. Chapter 1

Emma Taylor had only just arrived at Waterloo Road high school. She was starting in year 10 half way through the year. Emma was an average teenager she wasnt getting A* in her practise tests.

It was now monday morning her first day at waterloo road. Emma was dreading today she hated always being the new girl. Emma got ready into her new uniform, put her make up on then her and her dad walked to waterloo road.

"Dad you really dont need to come with me." Emma said.

"I want to its your first day." He said.

_Why was dad so annoying? He was always this close to me wouldnt let me go anywhere on my own. Its since Mum died 2 years ago when I was in year 8. Mum died because of cancer I hate it so much. We were such a great family. We were all happy then came along Tinkerbelle. Tinkerbelle was what mum called the cancer it was supposed to help her feel better but it didnt. I was with mum when she died you know. It was a Monday morning I was supposed to be at school but I didnt go mum was getting worse. I sat there the all morning with her holding her hand not letting go once. Mum was tired so I told her to go to sleep that she would see me when she woke up she kissed me on the forehead I kissed her forehead as well I told her I loved her and the whisper of her voice said it back. Mum went straight to sleep I listened to the little snore that came out of her. Dad came back in he told me that I shouldnt of let her go to sleep. I told him that she was tired she needed rest. He was very grumpy I told him that he might need sleep aswell he told me that a few hours wouldnt hurt so he went to sleep. I nodded off too I woke up the clock on the wall said 3:30 pm. Mum you should be waking up now or you wont want to sleep tonight I turned to look at her. She was gone, my mum was gone. NOOOOO I screamed. Dad woke up he ran to get someone but it was too late mummy had gone there was no bringing her back now. I love you mummy I whispered in her hear make sure you watch over me and daddy we need you I cried._

"Emma, Emma we are here welcome to your new school." Dad said.

Emma had gone off into her own world thinking about what happened she always thought about that when she was nervous it kind of soothed her in a weird kind of way.

"Dad you really dont have to come in with me im fine from here you should go home and unpack." Emma said.

"Oh you want rid of me now do you I thought you would turn out like this when you got half way through year 10 not wanting to be seen with me. Am I an embarressment or something?" Dad said.

"No,no I just thought it would be easier for you dad, why do you always turn everything to make it sound like its my fault. Ive had enough" emma said storming off down the path of waterloo road.


	2. Chapter 2

Emma had heard quite a few stories about this place. It didnt look as bad as what she had been told. The head teacher was Micheal Byrne he had been the head teacher for a few terms now and Sian Diamond and Tom Clarkson was his deputys.

Emma walked into the main enterance.

"Excuse me im new here I was told to go and see Mr Byrne when I arrived."Emma said to a nice looking lady.

"Hello you must be Emma Taylor yeah he is expecting you I will take you up to him now. Im Mrs Diamond by the way Im one of the deputy heads if you have a problem at all you can come and see me." She said smiling at Emma. Emma just smiled back. They arrived at Mr Burnes office. There was a Woman sat at the desk outside.

"Oh is this the newbie." The girl said.

"Yes Janecce this is Emma, Emma this is Miss Bryant the school secretary."

All of a sudden the door to what was the headteachers office opened.

" Hello you must be Emma Taylor." he said smiling at Emma then smiled at Mrs Diamond.

"Come and take a seat Emma." He said.

She went in and took a seat across from his spiny chair. Mr byrne sat down in his chair.

"Your timetable will be sorted out in a minute. How do you like it in Rochdale is it any better than Newcastle?" He asked Emma.

"Its ok I suppose but I wont be able to go and see mums grave everyday like I used to but Auntie Nancy said she would look after mum for me." Emma said.

"Yeh it must be hard leaving your family behind and your mums grave. How are you its been 2 years hasnt it?" he asked looking at her notes.

"Yeah 2 years tommorow. Im fine we are getting back to normal again a new start."Emma said.

Just then the secretary came in to the office with a piece of paper. Mr Bryne looked at it.

"Are these options right Music, Media and drama." Mr Bryne asked.

"Yeah." Emma said.

"Ok well with that sorted I will take you to registeration bells just about to go for form. You are in form 10A with Miss Boston." He said leading her out of the office and into the corridors that were slowly filling up as the bell went.


	3. Chapter 3

They arrived at a classroom with a woman that looked quite strict stood at the front and all the children were quiet. Mr Byrne knocked on the classroom door.

"Can I have a word with you for a minute Miss Boston."He said.

"Yes sure ok you lot be quiet and if I hear a noise from any of you, you will be doing a few laps of the field this dinner."Miss Boston warned the class.

She came out into the corridor she smiled at Emma.

"This is Emma she is a new student and is in your form im sure I can leave her in your capable hands."He said.

"Yes, Hi Emma im Miss Boston im your form teacher and im also an english teacher lets get in and get you sorted out."She said opening the door.

"FINN SHARKY your my first to be spending your lunch hour doing a few laps of the field congratulations anyone want to join him?" she asked everyone was silent.

"Good now I can introduce Emma, She is starting at waterloo road today and I hope you lot will make her feel welcome."Miss Boston said.

Emma got told to go and sit next to a girl called Lauren Andrews. There was no one sitting next to her as Sambuca used to sit there but sadly she died a few years before.

"Lauren can you show Emma around she has the same timetable as you and im sure your the best person to follow around."Miss Boston asked.

"Yeah sure."Lauren said.

"Hi Emma im lauren I guess im your new friend then. Where did you come from?" Lauren asked.

"Hi lauren I used to live in Newcastle I lived all over newcastle its nice up there you know." Emma said smiling.

"My Cousins live up there they used to always say that cheryl cole lived next to them I was so jealous." Lauren said laughing.

"Aww thats really cool ive seen her a few times my mum used to be friends with her." Emma said.

The bell went signaling first lesson she looked down at the timetable she had in her hand. For first thing on a monday morning was science with Mrs Diamond the lovely teacher that she had met before. Emma followed lauren to class.

"Right guys come on in get sat down so that we can begin."Mrs Diamond said standing at the door.

"Hi Emma you can go and sit down next to lauren on the end there." Mrs Diamond said.

Emma walked in and went and sat on the end next to lauren.

"Ok everyone we are going to do about DNA today. Now get your books out and start writing whats on the board while I get Emma a book." Mrs Diamond got Emma a new book and told her to copy what Lauren had on the front of her book.

Madi was sat on the other side of Lauren. "So whos this your showing around then."She said to lauren.

"This is Emma she's just moved here from Newcastle her mum knows cheryl cole."Lauren said.

"Really thats well good have you got a picture with her?" madi asked.

"Yeh there is one of me my mum and cheryl cole if you want to see it."Emma said.

"Hell yes thats well good."Lauren said.

Emma took her phone out and hid it under the desk trying to write down everything what was on the board and also trying to find the picture. Emma found the picture and showed it to Lauren and Madi.

"Wow thats well good." Lauren said.

"You must of hated your parents for moving down here. Do you think you can get your mum to take us with you to meet her?" Madi said excitedly.

"My mum passed away 2 years ago that picture was taken just before she got ill one of the last pictures she had taken." Emma said looking down.

"Im so sorry I didnt no." Madi said and lauren put her hand on Emmas sholder.

"Its ok I should of told you. Cheryl still keeps in touch to see how we are but its not the same as before."Emma said.

Just then tears escaped from Emma's eyes and she wiped them away. The end of the lesson came and Emma was so glad the lesson didnt go on any longer it was dragging so much. Emma walked with her two new friends. They all had music. Emma loved music they had Mr Wilding for both Music and Drama. Emma was a very good singer. Her favourite songs were "In the arms of an angel" and "see you again." She loved to sing them so much it just felt like she was singing them to her mum. They went in and sat down. Mr wilding introduced himself to her.

"So are you any good at music then Emma, do you play any instruments?"He asked her.

"Yeah ive been told so I used to be the lead singer in a group with my friends we did little concerts at the community centre and I also play the keyboard and the guitar." Emma said going slightly red as most of the class was looking at her now.

"Really that excellent I hope you can be as good here as you were up there." He said to her.

It was break time now. The three girls went off into the common room. Emma wasnt the same now. This is what happened she was happy when she started a new school. Well she painted a smile on her face then the true colours came. Emma looked so sad.

"Im sorry about your mum we didnt mean to upset you." Lauren said.

"Its fine it was ages ago its a new start now new town and a new school."Emma said.

"You must still miss her though?" Madi asked.

"Yeah of course I do I loved her so much but dad gets mad when I mention her he wants to move on with his life. Thats why we moved up here to get a new life. He was sick of me going to mums grave everyday."Emma said.

Lauren and Madi looked at Emma.

"How can you get on with life when the person you love the most has gone?" Lauren asked.

"Its hard I will never really get over my mum not being here but I need to try for dad."Emma said.

The bell went for 3rd the three girls made there way to english. They have Mr Clarkson for English. He welcomed Emma and told her to sit next to Lauren. They were learning about Of Mice and Men. Emma had never heard of this book so it was something new for her to learn. English went by really quick and so did the rest of the day. It was soon time for Emma to leave Lauren and Madi and go home and be with her dad.


	4. Chapter 4

"Emma, Emma." Her dad called.

She ran upstairs to her new bedroom. He had started unpacking her things.

"Yes dad?" Emma asked.

"What did I tell you we arent to have pictures of her in this house how many times do I have to tell you! " He yelled.

He ripped the picture up into little pieces. Emma looked horrorfied as they all fell to the floor.

"If I find anymore in this house you will get a good slap."He yelled.

He stormed out of the room and down the stair and out the front door.

Emma fell to the floor crying. She got hold of all the little pieces and hugged them.

"Mum, mum I love you so much whats happening to daddy. Where as the real him gone? Did he go with you? I wish I did."She cried.

He didn't come back till later on that night. He had gone straight to the pub to drown his sorrows. He wasnt the only one feeling down though Emma was too. Why couldn't he understand he wasn't the only one.

While her father had been out Emma had found a small pen knife in one of the boxes. Emma had cried so much that she had ran out of tears. She needed to release all the bad things out of herself. She got hold of the knife and started sliting at her arms. She let out a sigh of relief as blood trickeled down her arm.

The next morning Emma walk up with blood stains on her arms. She looked down at the scars and let out a little laugh.


	5. Chapter 5

Emma finally got out of bed and went down stairs. Her dad was sat in the kitchen when she came down.

"I Hope you've learnt your lesson. Never bring pictures of that thing into this house it will poison us do you hear me." He yelled.

"Yes dad." she said not wanting to argue with him. It was exactly 2 years today. All Emma wanted to do was visit her mum's grave but had to go to school instead.

Emma got to school very early today she couldnt stand another minute in that house she wanted to be on her own so that she could think about her had some very depressing songs playing on her ipod, she walked with her head down and hunched over. When she got to school she went and sat on a wall.

Her two new friends Lauren and Madi came over when they arrived.

"Hi Emma how are you today?" Lauren said.

"Hi im fine."Emma said not very happily.

The bell went for form and the three girls made there way inside. Emma really didnt want to be here today she missed her mum so much she just wanted her back.

Miss boston was ranting at the form this morning she wanted them to all take things a lot more serious than they were. Emma didnt really listen to what was being said instead she was staring out of the window thinking about that awful day her mum passed away.

"Emma did you listen to a word I just said?" Miss Boston asked.

"No" Emma said still staring out of the window.

"I beg your parden look at me when im speaking to you."She yelled.

"Just chill out will you." Emma yelled back.

"Just because its your second day at this school it doesnt mean you can speak to me or any member of staff like that you've lost your break and dinner congratulations your staying with me." Miss Boston said walking back to the front.

Everyone was looking at Emma and woundered why the new girl was behaving like this.

The bell went for the end of walked out with Lauren and they went to drama.

"What was all that about?" Lauren said to Emma.

"Just leave it it doesnt matter."Emma Said.

"Im sorry." Lauren said and walked over to where Madi was.

"Lauren Im sorry I shouldnt of been like that to you it wasnt your fault its just there is some things that are going on you wouldnt understand."Emma said.

Just as the lesson was about to begin Mr Byrne came in.

"Can I have Emma Taylor please?"He said.

Emma put the script down and followed the headteacher to his office. Emma remembered sitting in this place yesterday when she first arrived at this school.

"Emma Miss Boston told me about what happened in form do you care to explain your behaviour?" He said.

Emma didnt say anything she just sat there not giving Mr Byrne any eye contact at all.

"Emma im speaking to you. I know that it must be hard it being the annversary of your mums death but it does not excuse you behaving badly to anyone."He said.

"Shut up about my mum you didnt no her your not worthy of saying her name!" Emma yelled and ran out of the room.

"Emma, Emma come back here."Micheal yelled after her.

Emma ignored him and carried on running and ran out of the school got to the local park and sat on a bench and cried.

Micheal had gone and got tom as he had a free lesson now. Tom went out to try and find Emma. Micheal went back into drama and picked up Emma's bags.

"Mr Wilding Emma wont be coming back to this lesson."Micheal said.

"Ok ."He said and got back to his drama class.

Micheal emptied Emma's bag out in his office. All there was in her bag was some school books, ripped up pieces of paper and a pen knife. He didnt understand why she would have that in her bag but he put it in his draw and locked it in so that no one could get it.

Meanwhile Emma was still sat on the bench crying. Tom had parked his car next to the park and walked in the enterance. He walked around a bit shearching for Emma. He spotted her and instead of yelling her name and making her run off he just walked over to her.

Emma had her head down and from a distance you could tell she was crying.

"Emma?"Tom said sitting down on the bench next to her.

She didnt look up.

"Go away leave me alone."She cried.

"Emma you need to come back to school with me you cant stay here."He said.

"Why cant I its better than school."She said.

"You cant your supposed to be in school you've got me next you need to be in english."He said he put his hand on her soldier.

"Get off me." She cried as she pushed him away from herself.

"Its ok Emma im not going to hurt you, just please come back to school ok we can talk about everything back there."He said.

She lifted her head up and wiped her eyes.

"Am I going to get into trouble?"She asked.

"Well your still in trouble for what you said to Miss Boston but thats it we understand that your upset about your mum."He said.

"Im not I got over her ages ago she's just my genes thats all."She said biting her lip.

Tom knew that wasnt true but he finally got her to go back to school with him. When they arrived Micheal was waiting for them in the car park.

"Emma go to my office please."He said.

She walked off.

"Tom guess what I found in her bag? I found a pen knife I dont no what she uses it for but we are going to have to question here and make sure that she doesnt escape again." Micheal said.

"Ok well we better go after her by the way when I found her I said that we understand about her mum and that she must be upset and she said that shes im not I got over her ages ago and she said that shes only got her genes thats all I think there might be a problem with her emotions and how she grieved for her mother."Tom said.

"Thankyou for telling me I will see what thats about."Micheal said as they both walked up to his office. When they got up there Emma was sat where she sat before and she had noticed that her bag was on the desk.

"Why have you been going through my things you had no right!" Emma yelled.

"Emma sit down we were concerned about you, you had just run away we needed to see if we could find where you was."Micheal said.

"Well you had no right whats in my bag is my business ok."Emma said.

"No it isnt I found a pen knife in your bag whats that in for?" Micheal asked.

"What? Errmm it just is ok its for protection you do know what this estate is like dont you?" Emma said.

"That is no excuse to carry one of these things around with you so it being confiscated of you and you will not get it back ok."Micheal said.

"What? Why?" Emma mourned.

"Its for your own safety and the safety of others."He said to her.

Tom went and sat down in the chair next to Emma. She just looked at him.

"What?" she said when she noticed them looking at her.

"Emma we are just concerned about you said about your mother just being your genes thats not right you must feel something for her." Tom said.

Emma didnt say anything she just looked down and started messing with her hands. Tears escaped her eyes. The teachers could tell that she was in so much pain.

"I need to go, I need to get out of here."Emma yelled.

Tom got hold of her as she was trying to run and Micheal came around the desk to help him.

"Emma just sit back down."Tom said softly.

"Get off me I need to go please."She cried.

"Come on Emma dont do this again you cant run from everything when it get hard."Micheal said.

Emma fell to the floor crying. Tom sat down next to her.

"I know that its hard to grieve for someone especially if you love them so much I lost my girlfriend several years ago and I still miss her you know and its ok to grieve for them because they were a massive part of your life."Tom said.

Emma hugged him. Thats all that Emma needed was a hug from someone that cared.

The two men managed to get Emma back on to the chair and Micheal told Emma that he would take her home because there was no point in her being here if she was so upset like that.

Emma arrived home with Mr Byrne. No one was in she knew where her dad would be the pub.

"Are you sure you will be ok on your own?" Mr Byrne said.

"Yeah dad will be home soon probably gone to get some shopping in for tea."Emma lied.

"ok well see you tommorow and remember you can talk to any of us at waterloo road your not on your own." Mr Byrne said.

"Thanks sir."She said.

Emma went straight upstairs and searched through the rest of the boxes surely they would be another pen knife she needed to cut she wanted to feel free. The cuts from last night looked a mess but to her eyes it was beautiful. She found another knife and said to herself "Ive got to be careful with this one."


	6. Chapter 6

_**Thankyou for the people that have been reading my fanfiction :) I hope you still enjoy it and I hope that the next few chapters are protrayed as I wanted them to and that I hope they dont offend or upset anyone I know some of the things that have been wrote are a very serious topic but ive seen soemthing very similar to parts of this happen and thats my inspiration to write this story thankyou.**_

Months had past now she cut every single day and was cutting at every possible time she didnt eat much either anymore she couldnt be bothered. Emma was a very emotional person and always was in her own world. She had still managed to keep Lauren and Madi as her friends. Emma walked to school as usual it was a Wednesday morning and only a few more days left at school till the weekend where she could just cut herself all the time and watch depressing videos and cry.

"Emma, Hello." Lauren yelled.

"Hi." Emma replied.

"You ok?" Lauren asked.

"Yeah im fine you?"Emma replied.

"Yeah you look a bit pale today."Lauren said.

"Oh my makeup went a bit wrong this morning."Emma said.

The bell went and they both headed into form. Miss Boston was paping on about different things in form. Emma couldn't really be bothered listening to everything she was saying and was staring out of the window. The bell went for first lesson she has triple science today just what she needed.

Emma walked in to science and sat down in her normal place.

"Good morning class we will be doing about mitosis and Miosis today."Mrs Diamond said.

Emma really couldn't be bothered. Her arms were aching and she really needed to cut again.

"Miss please can I go to the toliet?" Emma said.

"Yes be quick though." Mrs Diamond said.

Emma walked into the bathroom got her knife out her pocket and started slitting her skin again. Blood trickeled down her arm again like it had last night and for as many nights as she could let the blood run then she put her blazor back on and went back to class.

Emma sat back down and pretended to listen. Thats all she could do. She was staring out of the window for most of the morning. Bell went for break they still had another hour of science after break.

Emma went out with Lauren.

" I wounder where madi is today."Lauren said to Emma.

"Maybe she's ill text her." Emma said.

"I will do." Lauren said starting to text Madi. They sat down on a bench outside.

"She's not texting back I will just ask Mrs Diamond when we go back into class."Lauren said.

"Yeh good idea. Look im just going to go to the toliet I will meet you in class."Emma said.

"I'll come with you." Lauren said.

"No! I mean no you might as well go and try and find Mrs Diamond now it might be easier." Emma said.

"Ok I will meet you back in class."Lauren said.

Lauren thought there was something really odd going on with Emma why did she not want her to go in with her that was just weird lauren thought. Lauren went and found Mrs Diamond and asked where madi was. She found out that madi had that bug that was around so wasnt in.

The bell went Emma went into class and sat down again next to lauren.

"Madi's got that bug." Lauren said.

"What?" Emma said totally oblivious.

"Madi our friend as got the bug that why she isnt in school." Lauren said again.

"Oh ok poor her." Emma said.

Mrs Diamond started talking again.

"Ok now we are going to do a fun practical as you all worked so hard this morning. Everyone take your blazors off and put them at the back on the classroom.

Emma looked up how could she take her blazor off her harms were still bleeding she could feel it what would everyone say. She remained sat down as everyone else took their blazors to the back.

"Come on Emma take your blazor off." Mrs Diamond said.

"No im ok miss I will just watch." Emma replied.

"No I want everyone joining in come on everyone else is." Mrs Diamond said.

Everyone was now looking over at Emma.

"No im not taking my blazor off im cold ok." Emma said.

"Emma outside now."Mrs Diamond said.

Emma walked outside followed by Mrs Diamond.

"Emma I know your new here but it does not give you the right to speak to be like that and disrespect me."She said.

"I just said that im not taking my blazor off."Emma said.

"Why is there something wrong?" Mrs Diamond said.

"No there is nothing wrong I just dont want to ok." Emma said.

"No its not ok. Lift up your sleeves prove there is nothing wrong." Mrs Diamond said.

"No why should I do that." Emma said.

"Just do it." Mrs Diamond said.

Emma sighed and lifted her sleeve up one by one. All the scars appeared and Mrs Diamond was started crying.

"See now do you know why I didnt want to do the practical."Emma yelled.

"Ssh calm down Emma everything will be ok." Mrs Diamond said pulling her into a hug.

"Lets go to my office I will get someone to cover for me lets have a chat." Mrs Diamond said.

Emma and Mrs Diamond started walking towards the they got in Mrs Diamond sat Emma down then sat down next to her. She got hold of Emma's hand.

"Now take your time Emma and tell me whats been going on?"Mrs Diamond said.

Emma looked up at her. Tears were streaming down her face.

"I just dont no Miss."Emma said.

"well when did you first start you know cutting yourself." She asked.

"Well it was the first night of my first day here at this school." Emma cried.

"Ok, Why Emma do you remember why you was feeling like you needed to do this?" Mrs Diamond asked.

"Yes I do. Well I got in from school. Dad called me upstairs he had been unpacking my things and her found a picture of me and mum. He said that I should never have another picture of her again. He ripped it up and then he left went down to the pub. I sat down on my bedroom floor were the picture was scattered, picked the little bits up and hugged them close and cried. I cried for a very long time. I couldnt cry anymore . I woundered why I was even here. I thought I was being punished so I looked in the boxes and found a knife. I started cutting it felt better. It was something no one knew about it was something that made everything seem better."Emma cried. Emma put her hands over her eyes and cried.

Mrs Diamond pulled her into a hug.

"Emma you should have said something we could of helped you. We could of made all of the problems go away."She said.

"You couldnt. No one can, Cant you see there is no cure for me. I want to be with mum I cant deal with all this I need to be free. "Emma cried.

"I can help a lot of people can help you. There is a cure for you we just need to get you to a doctor. I know you want to be with your mum and im sure that she wants to be with you but down here not up there. Emma you can talk to me and we will sort some counciling out for you."Mrs Diamond said.

Mrs Diamond got Emma a doctors appointment straight away. She went with Emma for support; she needed it.

"Emma can you tell me how you feel?" The doctor asked.

"Well I feel tired, sad, depressed, unwanted, unloved the list go's on."Emma said.

"How long have you been feeling like this?" She asked.

"Well since mum got ill I always felt sad and tired because I thought I wasnt going to see mum again. I only started cutting though when I came her a few months ago."Emma said.

"Ok lets have a look at your cuts."The doctor asked.

Emma lifted her sleeves up.

"Ok yeh you really do need some help and im sure that with me and your school teachers behind you, you will get through this just give it time ok."The doctor said.

Emma nodded.

"Thankyou doctor we are going to sort her out with some counciling at school and we are going to give her as much support as possible."Mrs diamond said leaving with Emma.

They got back to school. Mr Byrne met them in the car park.

"Emma do you want to go striaght to my office we will be up in a minute ok?" Mr Byrne said.

Emma walked into school and went straight up to Mr Byrnes office.

"How is she?" Mr Byrne asked Mrs Diamond.

"She's very sad the doctor said that she's severly depressed she gave her some anti depressant and she thinks its a good idea that Emma talks to me everyday about her feelings."Mrs Diamond said.

"Ok I just hope we can help her. The poor girl I cant believe that she's been suffering for so long. I rang up her father and told him what has been going on. He didnt sound very happy but at least he knows why she's been acting different."Mr Byrne said.

The two of them started walking inside.

"Michael he was the one that ripped the last picture Emma had of her and her mum you know." Sian said.

"Really I wounder why he did that?"Michael said.

"I dont know maybe he was just angry Emma didnt really say anything else about her father. Lets go and get her sorted out and find a way we can help her." Sian said.

"Yeah we need to help her as much as possible this is awful the poor girl." Michael said.

The two teachers finally got to the office Emma was just sat down on one of the chairs across from his desk. It was the chair she had sat on the day she had arrived at this school ; everything was a lot easier then.

Both teachers went into the office Mr bryne sat at his desk and Mrs Diamond sat down in the chair next to Emma.

"Emma are you ok?" Mr Bryne asked.

Emma looked up at him.

"I need to get out of here can I go to the toliet?" She asked despratly.

"Emma, Emma calm down. You dont need to go you need to stay here."Mrs Diamond said.

Emma fell on the floor crying. She couldnt handle not being able to cut. She wanted to be with her mum so much she didnt want to be on this earth she wanted to be somewhere better where she could be with her mum.

Micheal had joined Sian who was stood over Emma.

"Emma, darling please get up. Your going to be ok."Sian said.

Emma got the pen knife out of her pocket and lifted up her sleeves.

"Emma please don't you need to stop doing this." Mrs Diamond said.

"Its the only good thing in my life."Emma cried.

Mr Bryne grabbed the knife out of Emma's hand and took it away.

"No please give me it back what am I supposed to do without it, its my life."Emma cried.

"No you won't be getting it back its for your own safety now im going to take you home amd make sure your ok." Mr bryne said.

Micheal got Emma up off the floor with the help of sian and they took her out to the car.

"Seat belt please." Micheal said to Emma.

Emma put the seat belt on and just stared out of the window oblivious to everything around her. It didnt take them long to get to Emma's house. Micheal took Emma inside and suprise suprise Her dad wasnt in.

"Emma I can't leave you here on your own."Micheal said.

"Its fine he will be back home soon and my auntie is stopping over she came all the way from newcastle."Emma said.

All of a sudden the back door opened and her dad walked in.

"Hello I just brought Emma back just to make sure she didnt do anything stupid."Micheal said to Emma's dad.

"That was nice of you but she's fine im in now so you can go." Emma's dad said.

"I will see you at school tommorow and make sure you remember to take those tablets and make sure you remember to come and find Mrs Diamond straight away tommorow." Micheal said.

"Yes ok." Emma said.

Emma's dad showed Micheal to the door then when he was gone came back into the front room.


	7. Chapter 7

"Im ashamed of you Emma. How could you do this to me. You made me have to come early from the pub for this and aww your depressed whats with the sob story get over yourself. Everything is revolved around you and im sick of you absolutly sick of you. I wish that you stay like this and really hurt yourself so then I dont need to look at your ugly face everyday."He said.

"Dad I cant help it you know that right its your fault im like this you never let me talk about mum I miss her and I know you do too but you wont let me mention her."Emma yelled.

Her dad slapped her across the face.

"What did I tell you dont mention her ever." Her dad yelled.

"Just because you can forget about her and push her out of your life I cant ok just stop it stop it I hate you so much I wish it was you that had died not her then I would not be like this and I would be back home." Emma yelled.

She knew she had said too much. Her dad started kicking the crap out of her he took her upstairs. She was in so much pain. She blanked out after a while she hoped that she had died.


	8. Chapter 8

Emma got up off the floor all her body was in agony. What had he done to her? It was only got up got her uniform on then grabbed her diary.

_Dear Diary,_

_Today is the day my life will end. Im scared but its the only way I can be free from everything thats gone on in my life. I want to be with mum so much I hate dad for what he has done. He shouldnt have gone like this its his fault. I love my new friends they have been so great for me but they dont no whats really going on do they? They dont know the real Emma. Deep down ive been like this since mum died. But when I was in Newcastle somehow it didnt feel as bad as it does now. Being here is the worst feeling ever and I dont no how people can cope when a love one dies. But no one cares about me do they? Maybe my friends might be sad for a few days and dad will pretend to be but he wont really be sad he will just get rid of any evidence that I even existed wont he ;just like he did with mum._

_This will be the last time I will write in here goodbye :) _

_Emma _

She signed it with her name then placed her Diary in her had placed a few more things in there and by this time it was 7:30 and she had everything she needed. She headed for school very early she had nothing else to do. She hadnt taken any more of them tablets she didnt feel the need to take them if she was going to die today.


	9. Chapter 9

Emma climbed in through the little gap in one of the fences and found a window that must have been left open yesterday.

She jumped in and found herself in the girls changing rooms. What a perfect place to end my life she thought letting out a little giggle of excitement.

She got herself prepared and set up the rope it was now close to 8:30 teachers would be arriving soon she thought so she hurried things along. She placed her bag down got her ipod out and placed the ear pieces in her ears. She put 'In the arms of an angel' on repeat and then she got the picture of her and her mum that she printed out last night and held it tight.

"Im coming home mummy I wont be long." Emma cried.

Emma jumped off the bench with the rope attached around her neck. She just hung there. One of her head phones had fallen out but sher felt to weak to reach for it. She felt herself slipping away she couldnt breathe.

Just at that moment the bell went for form. Miss Boston woundered where Emma was.

"As anyone seen emma?" She asked the form group.

"Miss I think she had a meeting with Mrs Diamond."Lauren said.

"Oh yeah how could I forget thankyou for reminding me lauren."Miss Boston said.

The bell went for first period Emma would have PE with lauren and Madi and obviuosly the rest of the class. Lauren met up with Madi just outside the changing rooms where Emma hung.

"Where's Emma?" Madi asked.

"Shes with Mrs Diamond."Lauren said.

"Ok is it something to do with what happened yesterday?" Madi said.

"Yeah I will fill you in, in PE come on lets go in."Lauren said.

Lauren opened the door to the changing rooms. She saw Emma and screamed.

"What what ?"Madi said looking past Lauren. Madi screamed aswell.

Mr Clarkson heard all the noise and wanted to know what was happening.

He turned the corner and saw Madi and Lauren screaming and hugging each other.

"Its ok girls im coming to get the spider out of your changing rooms you dont have to scream the school down."He joked.

But his mood changed when he reached where the two girls were stood.

"Everyone clear this area Madi quickly go and get Sian and Mr byrne "He yelled.


	10. Chapter 10

He ran over to where Emma was and quickly pushed her back so that the rope wasnt strangling her. He then cut the rope. Emma fell on the floor.

"Emma, Emma can you hear me please dont go stay live your life."Tom said.

Just then the other teachers arrived.

"OMG."Sian said.

"Tom we have rung an ambulance is she breathing?" He said.

"Slightly but only just i'll be surprised if she survives im afriad." Tom said looking down at Emma's frail body.

An ambulance came Sian went with her in the ambulance and Micheal and Tom followed in Toms car.

It wasnt looking good for Emma none of the teachers had realised that it had gotten this bad for Emma they knew that she had a problem with the cutting but they thought that she wasnt going to get better with all the help that she was getting.

They managed to get Emma to the hospital but when they got there she wasnt doing that good. The teachers were just hoping that Emma would pull through and could get proper help.

They put Emma on a machine and everyone was hoping that she would pull through. She was an extremely lucky girl that they found her when they did otherwise she would have been gone. Maybe it was fate that they found her maybe someone from up above helped her. Her mum was up there she wouldnt want her to die at such a young age would she.

"I cant believe that this happened I should of gone looking for her she was supposed to meet me." Sian said.

"Its not your fault you didnt know that this was going to happen."Micheal said.

"I just wish she could of come and talked to us instead of putting herself through all of this."Sian said.

"Well whats happened as happened we cant change it now but hopefully she will pull through this and then we can help her."Tom said.

"I wounder if they have got in touch with her dad yet he should be here." Micheal said getting up and walking toward the desk.

"Excuse me do you know If Emma Taylors dad has been informed about what has happened?" Micheal asked.

"We did ring the house phone but there was no answer we are going to keep trying he must have gone out to the shops or something."The nurse said.

"Ok thankyou well let us know if you get in touch with him." Micheal said.

"We will do and we will let you know if there are any changes with Emma she's still completely out of it we are hoping that she will wake in at least a few hours."The nurse said.

Micheal went and joined the other two teachers.


	11. Chapter 11

_Hi sorry I havent updated for a while ive been ill. Im just woundering what you guys want to happen next because its you lot that im writing this for so please comment and if you want it to go a certain way then I can write it thankyou :) xxx sorry its not a big update …._

Four hours later Emma was still very critical and they still didnt know whether she would pull through or not. Emma's dad had finally arrived they couldnt get hold of him because he was in his favourite place the pub. He sat down with the three teachers that was still there waiting for any news.

"Mr Taylor im so sorry that Emma did this I just hope that she has the strength to pull through."Sian said.

"Thankyou to be honest I dont know whether she will pull through by the looks of it she was quite determined to kill herself all she wants is her mum im not good enough." He said.

It was one of the first times that Mr Taylor had actually even said the words her mum. The way he said them words though was like they were posion that something bad would happen to him if he said them so many times.


	12. Chapter 12

The bit in bold is Mr Taylor's thoughts ...

The teachers really wanted to know why Emma had been so tortured to do what she had done. They thought that Emma was going to get all the help that was there for her. They never thought that she would of done anything like that.

"Mr Taylor have you let any of your family know about Emma?"Mr Byrne asked.

"No not yet im still trying to take it all in how can she have done that? I dont get why she would try and put me through all of this it was bad enough losing one of my princess' I cant loose her aswell I wont have anybody left."Mr Taylor said.

"Mr Taylor she didnt do this to put you through pain cant you see Emma was in so much pain that this was her cry for help, you shouldnt be thinking of yourself you should be thinking about Emma, about how she must of felt to do what she did, she must have been so scared to do that I mean she knew that she wasnt going to see you anymore – that must have been heart breaking for her."sian said.

"Your right I shouldnt be thinking about myself thats all I have done since her mother passed. Thats the reason we moved here for me I know Emma didnt want to move down here I knew that it would make her unhappy but I didnt listen to her. I knew that she was unhappy she's never been herself since her mother passed I didnt help her though did I?"Mr taylor said putting his head down.

What do you mean you didnt help her? Sian said softly.

"I knew that she was depressed I could see the coldness in her how she changed she looked so empty, your probably thinking how would I know she was depressed well thats how I was when I was her age. My twin brother died a few weeks before our 14th birthday. I didnt get any help and I nearly did what Emma did but I found Emma mum thats how long we knew each other she helped me. My parents didnt want to know they couldnt handle it that I was depressed. Well thats what I did with Emma I couldnt handle her being what I was I didnt want her to go through all the things that I did. I know I shouldnt of done what I did."He said.

"Mr Taylor im so sorry about your brother and I understand that you know what Emma is going through and it must have been awful for you that your parents didnt want to help you but surely you would want to help Emma with it. I know its awful seeing your children suffer but you should of handled it what do you mean when you say you shouldnt of done what you did?"Sian asked.

There was silence for a couple of minutes.

**I really should tell them but what will happen to me then? Yeah im being selfish again. Ive never once stopped and thought about Emma. She must have been so scared. Why did I even do that to her she's my daughter, my princess, now maybe my angel. I shouldnt of started drinking that much again. This is what happens when im drunk I cant control my actions. They look like they are waiting for an answer I hope they can understand...**

"Well you see ….. erm... yesterday evening I was horrorfied that she was depressed... I couldnt handle it... I had been called away from the pub because of her... drink was the only way I could handle things... I told her that she should get over herself and that everything had to revolve around her... I told her that I hope she really did hurt herself so I wouldnt have to look at her face again... I slapped her she mentioned her mother I hated when she mentioned her I knew that she would have been disapointed in me... I yelled at her... she yelled back telling me what was true... she told me that she wished it was me that was the one that died instead of her mum...i hated hearing the truth... I hated her for saying all of this... so I kicked her …. I didnt no what I was doing …. all I knew was that I wanted all the pain to stop inside her... she blanked out after a while thats when I realised what I had done... I hated myself for it... I kissed her forehead and picked her up I took her upstairs and put her in her room... I whispered in her ear im sorry im sorry... I really didnt mean to do that I just wanted all that pain to stop for her I didnt want her to be depressed... but now I might not even be able to tell her im sorry I might not be able to put things right..."Mr Taylor cried.


	13. Chapter 13

The teachers were really shocked at what Mr Taylor had just said. They couldnt pretend that the things he just said wasnt true but they knew deep down that he didnt mean for the horrible things to happen. But they couldnt turn a blind eye to it.

"Mr Taylor its good that you have been honest with us and told us all of this but you do realise that when Emma does come around that she wont be able to stay with you for a while its just I think you need help and we will support you but Emma needs to be looked after properly especailly now that she is so vulnrable."Micheal said.

"Yes I understand she deserves so much better and im determined to get myself sorted I know that she needs me and I need her."He said.

"Sorry to interupt Im Emma's doctor she coming around im sure she wants you three in there when she does if you would like to follow me." The doctor said.

They got to a little room that was all on its own on the edge of the ward.

"If you need me just give us a call." He said.

All three of them went in. Mr Taylor just staying in the corner of the room not going anywhere near the bed. Micheal and sian sat at either side of the bed. Sian got hold of Emma's hand so that Emma knew that someone was here.

Emma's eyes started to open and she started moving her hands.

"Emma, Emma are you awake?"Sian said.

"Am I in heaven."Emma asked

"No Emma its Mrs Diamond your in hospital."Sian said.

"NOO."Emma said starting to cry. Sian stood up and hugged Emma its going to be ok your safe now and we are going to help you get all those bad thoughts away."Sian said.

"I want to be with mum though."Emma said.

"Im sure she wants you just as much but she must of given you a second chance to live she must have wanted you to stay here with your dad."Sian said.

"But he isnt even here." Emma cried.

"Princess im right here."Mr Taylor called.

"Dad, dad your really here I didnt think you would."Emma said.

"of course your my little princess im so sorry for everything that happened I hope you can forgive me. I love you so much and I know its going to be hard but we can fix this I promise."he said.

"Dad im sorry too I know that its been hard for you too and I didnt think about you."Emma cried.

"No you shouldnt be sorry all you did was think about me and that was totally wrong it shouldnt of been like that and I know mum wouldnt of liked the person I turned into."He said.

"Dad I love you please never leave me I dont think I would be able to cope if I lost you aswell."Emma said.

"Im not going anywhere."He cried.


	14. Chapter 14

_Sorry I havent updated in a while had a few things to do. I hope this chapter is ok its not long but I will upload a few more chapters very soon. I hope you enjoy please tell me what you think thankyou :) _

Micheal left the hospital room with Sian. They couldnt pretend that Mr Taylor didnt tell them what he did. They knew he needed help. Micheal got his phone out of his pcoket. He rang social services. Both Sian and Micheal both knew that Mr Taylor did love his daughter but she wasnt safe with him they had both been through so much that most of these events that had happened wasnt anyone's fault.

Micheal informed the social worker about everything that had happened to the Taylor's these past few years. The social worker told Micheal that when they were living in Newcastle that the social services were told that Mr Taylor was unfit to look after his daughter but they just left and they didnt know where they had moved too.

"I can't believe it."Sian said.

"Neither can I." Micheal said.

"So they didnt come here by choice they came because Emma would have been taken away from him? Sian asked trying to understand it all.

"Thats what it looks like."Micheal said.

"I cant help but feel sorry for them both. They must of both had it hard after Emma's mother died. Its not easy for anyone when someone you love dies."Sian said looking through the window at them.

Mr Taylor was sat on Emma's bedside.

"Im so sorry Emma I cant believe that I made you feel that bad."He said.

"Dad its fine it wasnt just you I just hate life thats all so dont go blaming yourself."Emma said

"But if I hadnt of brought you here then you might of not got that depressed and I would have been helped my grandma and grandad and your aunties and uncles."He said.

"Dad we didnt have a choice and you know it. Social would of taken me away. I didnt want that I wanted to stay with you." Emma said.

Mr Taylor got up from Emma's side. He knew that she would be taken away from him now. He couldnt bear it he didnt want his little princess taken away, she was all he had left. He didnt want to tell her. He knew she would be really upset and he didnt want her doing anything stupid.

"Ive got to go angel I will be back in a few hours I will just go get some of your things im sure you will want to feel a bit more normal."He said.

"Dad hurry back."Emma said.

He kissed her on her forehead.

"Get some rest. I will be right here when you wake up."He whispered.


	15. Chapter 15

Mr Taylor went out the door. Emma watched as he went over to the two teachers.

"I've got to go home for a while pick up a few of her things. Im right arent I you have rang the social havent you?"Mr Taylor said.

"Yes im afraid we had to Mr Taylor and they are sending a social worker over. They told us that Emma was supposed to be taken away from you when you was in Newcastle is that true?"Micheal said.

"Yes its true I wasnt looking after her properly I knew it was wrong of me. But we were both so sad. Emma was the only thing I had left that reminded me of her mum I could lose they told me that Emma was going to be taken away from me I couldnt handle it. Emma didnt want it either so I promised her that we could make a new life somewhere else together." Mr Taylor said

"It must have been hard for you both back then. But you do understand that Emma will be taken into care because she needs taking care of and you need help and time to get your life back on track. Your not thinking of running again are you is that why your going home?" Sian asked.

"Yeah it was hard for us both. I know that she will and I think that it will be good for us both to have time to get ourselves sorted. I should of listened to the social in Newcastle she wouldnt be in a hospital bed right now would she. No we arent running away I knew that you would of rang social and I knew that they were going to take her away from me but I really cant be here when they tell her that she cant stay with me no more I know it will break her heart and it will break mine seeing her like that. She knows I love her and I will never leave her but its best if it happens like this. Mr Taylor said. He didnt stick around he just left striaght away.

"Micheal I think that it will be best if we tell her hes right she has been through so much and if it nearly tore her apart bearly being taken away from her dad is Newcastle its going to be even worse now." Sian said.

"Ok I will go and tell her, you better wait here it wont be too long till the social worker gets here."Micheal said.


	16. Chapter 16

Micheal entered the room. Emma looked up at first she thought it was her dad coming back.

"How you feeling?" Micheal asked.

"A bit better, do you know when my dads coming back?" Emma asked

"No im sorry he said he wasnt going to be too long." Micheal said.

"Sir, will I still be able to come to waterloo road or will I get sent somewhere else?"Emma asked

"You can still come to Waterloo road but you will have to hacve regular meetings with somebody and we will be checking up on you all the time just so that we know your ok."Micheal said.

"Ok." Emma said.

"Emma, your dad told us about what happened the night before and he told us everything thats been going on. Im afraid because he's told us we cant just let it go we had to ring the social. Someone is coming in to speak to you in a while. They were already informed aftert you tried to take your own life." Micheal said.

"Sir please I dont want to be taken away from him he does love me and he does care about me its just all the pressure we've been under since mum died. He didnt mean anything and it wasnt because of dad that I was trying to take my life. Please dont take me away from him it will just make things worse." Emma cried.

"Emma I know that he loves and cares for you. But your not safe and you both need time to get yourselves sorted you need time to yourself were you can have time to get your life back on track. It will only be until you two are both ready."Micheal said.

"NO please I am safe with him I cant be with out him it will just be like losing mum all over again. I wish that I had of died then I wouldnt have to go through all of this."Emma cried.

"Emma calm down. Dont say that you should be happy that you survived but im afraid you cant stay eith your dad at the moment he needs some time for himself and you need some time aswell. We will be by your side every step of the way Emma."Micheal said. He got hold of Emma's hand.

"Will I be put with complete strangers?"Emma asked.

"Maybe, but they will be very nice people they will understand what you have been through and they will help you so that you can go back to your dad."Micheal said.

"How will they understand me they have never met me before. I dont want to live with strangers thats why we moved here so I didnt get put with complete strangers."Emma said.

"They will have been trained to understand people and they will be very nice me and Mrs Diamond wont let them put you with anyone we dont think will understand you ok. Emma you cant run forever you've got to understand that."Micheal said.

Sian entered the room.

"Sorry to interupt the social worker is here." Sian said.

"Im not ready to see the social worker yet Miss please dont send her in."Emma said.

Sian went over to stand next the were Micheal was sat.

"Emma its all going to be ok and the sooner you speak to her then the sooner everything will get sorted out."Sian said.

"ok Miss but will you two stay here aswell."Emma said.

"Yes we will be right here we arent going anywhere."Sian said.

Sian went and got the social worker in.

"Hello Emma hope your feeling better im Elaine your social worker ive come to talk to you about were you will be staying."Elaine said.

"Please cant I just stay with dad we didnt mean to let things get this out of hands."Emma pleaded.

"No Im sorry its too risky especially after what happened to you today. There are a few families we have found that are suitable for you."Elaine said.

"Our they local I want to stay at waterloo road please."Emma asked.

"Well the ones we found suitable for you live quite far away im afraid."Elaine said.

"No please miss dont let them take me away from waterloo road its the only place that I have got left now ive got friends here I dont want to lose Madi and Lauren they are the bestest friends ive ever had. I know if I move im just going to get worse I will cut more I just know it please dont take me away from somewhere I call home now."Emma cried.

"Elaine please could you find her somewhere around her we dont want her getting worse and it is true its the only place that shes actually opened up to."Sian pleaded Emma's case.

"Well their arent that many people around here willing to take children in so we will have to find someone. I will see what I can do."Elaine said.

"Elaine would it be possible if Emma came and stayed with me it would be ideal she could still come to waterloo road and she would be with her best friend Madi could that work? Sian asked.

"Well I suppose it could work Emma clearly trusts you and her best friend is there and she can stay at waterloo road. I will sort it out now."Elaine said.

Emma's face had lit up Emma like Sian she was the person she opened up to about the slef harm and plus her best friend would be there and she wouldnt have to leave waterloo road.


	17. Chapter 17

A few days later and Emma was allowed to leave the hospital. Lauren and Madia had both been in to see her and Madi was really happy that Emma would be coming to stay with them. Emma's social worker had sorted it all out with Sian and Micheal.

Emma knew very well that even if she did live with them she stll would feel the same 's been cutting for so long that she knew that it wouldnt just magically go away. No one could change how she felt. The doctor had told Emma not to go to school for a couple of days and to rest. What her body went through was tromatic.

"Emma im going to tell Mr Byrne that im staying off with you for a couple of days."Sian said to Emma on Monday morning.

"No please I dont want to keep you off work."Emma said.

"No its fine I want to keep an eye on you I will be catching up on marking anyway."Sian said.

Emma knew the truth though. Sian wasnt going into school because she was scared that Emma was going to self harm again. Sian wouldnt let Emma be on her own at all. When Sian wasnt there it was either Madi or Zac there.

"Sian can I stay off and keep her company?"Madi asked.

"No you need to go to school."Sian said.

"It was worth a try."Madi laughed.

"See you later." Emma said.

"I will bring lauren back later and we can do each others makup if you want."Madi said.

"Yeah that will be fun."Emma said.

Madi and Zac both left for school it was now only Sian and Emma. Emma knew that all she had to look forward to today was day time tv great.


	18. Chapter 18

Emma stayed in her room for most of that day. She couldnt face sitting down stairs watching tv all day. Sian went in her room just after 12 o clock.

"Emma ive made you a sandwich do you want to come and join me?"She asked.

"Thankyou im ok up here."Emma said.

"Ok well you know where I am if you want to join me."Sian said.

"Yeah."Emma said.

Emma put the sandwiches on the side she wasnt hungry at all. She went back to the computer screen. She was listening to music. The music that ment a lot to her.

Emma had made several youtube videos about what she did and tried to be very open with people on youtube. She clicked on the last video she put on. It was her talking about what she was feeling inside. She has uploaded it the day before she had tried to commit sucide. In the video she had mentioned how if it wasnt for waterloo road she wouldnt be here. Emma was very emotional as she watched it back to herself.

Emma scrolled sown to the messages. She was horrified to see loads of hate messages. It made her feel even worse. One person put "Do us all a favour and go soon it will be better for us all you emo bitch!" Someone else had put " I can see why your family dont like you do your self a favour!"

As Emma read all of these messages tears slipped down her face. How could people be so cruel. They didnt know her how could they say things like that. Emma turned the webcam on and started making a video.

"Hi its Emma here I know what I said in my last video about giving up and going to be with my mum well my plan didnt go to plan sadly the teachers found me before I died so I am sorry to disapoint all of you that wanted me gone and you will have to put up with me for a bit longer. To the people who put all these hate comments on my over video can I just say how can you say something like that when you dont even know me. None of you really know all the things that have gone on for me during my life. Oh and some of you might be interested heres the newested scar this is what I did about an hour ago its really pretty isnt it, it says hate with a love heart. Well ive got to go now im sure you might see me again im sorry if you are all disapointed." Emma said as she ended the video. She then uploaded it to youtube she waited till people viewed it. There were some more nasty messages. People were talking about her new scar they were saying that she was a sick and twisted girl.

One message read " We know what school you go to and just wait we will be coming over to give you what you deserve." Loads of people liked it and asked if they could join in.

Emma turned youtube off and sat crying on her bed. After about ten minutes she decided to check her facebook page. She had hate all over it. She slammed the laptop shut she knew what people was saying and it would have got all around that people were coming up to give her what she deserved.

Emma grabbed her blade from under her bed and started cutting blood poured down her arm it dripped on to the white sheet.

"Shit" Emma cried.

At school it was nearly time to go home for Madi and the rest of the students. Madi and Lauren were in English with Miss Boston.

"Hows Emma ?"Miss Boston asked Madi as she came over to mark her work.

"Well I think she's getting better slowly im just trying to help her she should be coming back to school tommorow she wanted to come today but Sian wouldnt let her she needs to rest."Madi said.

"Well im glad that she's getting better and tell her that we are all thinking of her."Mis boston said.

"I will do miss."Madi said.

When the bell went Lauren walked home with Madi. Emma was still in their room when they go back. Madi and Lauren ran up the stairs to see Emma.

"Emma."Lauren shouted.

"Hi Lauren hi madi."Emma said painting a smile on her face.

"What you been doing today then?"Madi asked.

"Nothing really just been sat up here all day I needed rest I went on the laptop aswell for a bit nothing on at all." Emma said.

"We have well missed you."Lauren said.

"Awww really ive only been gone for a few days."Emma said.

"Yeah we still have missed you."Madi said.

"Aww thanks guys your making me feel loved."Emma said.

Lauren and Madi gave Emma a big hug.

"Oh Miss Boston was asking about you aswell she said she hoped to see you soon."Madi said.

"Thats nice of her."Emma said.

"Who's is this sandwich im starving?" Lauren asked.

"Oh it was mine I fell asleep just after Sian brought it up for me you can have it if you want."Emma said.

"Aww thanks." Lauren said.

"Im sure tea wont be too long anyway."Madi said.

"What we having today?"Emma asked.

"I think Sian is making us pizza."Madi said.

All three girls were happy about that they loved pizza. Just as they were talking about it Sian shouted up " Girls pizza's ready."


	19. Chapter 19

After they all ate their pizza the three girls and Sian put on face masks and talked about things they were talking about who their favorite celebrity was and how much they liked one direction.

After about an hour Sian told Emma that they could go back to school tommorow. Emma was dreading it now especially after what had been said on youtube and facebook.

It was now about 10 o clock at night and Lauren was still there.

"Lauren you can stay the night if you want I will just have to ask your mum if its ok."Sian said.

"Yeah ok."Lauren said.

Lauren got her phone and dialled her mums number into it. The phone started ringing.

"Hello its Sian Diamond Madi's mum I was just woundering if Lauren could stay tonight because the three girls have been having so much fun we didnt realise the time."Sian said.

Lauren's mum agreed. The three girls were happy.

"Well i'll leave you three girls to it but be in bed for no later than half eleven ok."Sian said.

"Ok."Madi said.

"Goodnight."All three girls said.

"Goodnight"sian said back.

The girls watched a bit of tv then they went up to Madi's and Emma's room.

"Ok lets push the two beds together so that we have a double bed."Madi said.

Emma was really hoping the neither of them would notice the blood stain on the sheet on her bed.

Madi turned the light off and they all jumped into bed.

"good night."Madi said.

"Goodnight."the other two girls chorused.

The next morning Sian walked into the girls room.

"Come on you three its time to get up."Sian said

"Oh." Madi groaned.

"Come on we're all going to be late if you dont get up."Sian said.

The three girls finally got up.

"We will put the beds back to normal later."Madi groaned.

All three of them went down for breakfast. Sian had poured them all some cornflakes out into a bowl.

Lauren and Madi started eating them straight away but Emma just twirled them around the dish.

"You ok Emma?"Sian asked.

"Yeah im fine."She said.

"You know today is going to be fine you know and if you need me then just come and find me."Sian said.

"Ok, im not really hungry right now im just going to get ready."Emma said leaving the table.

Emma went straight upstairs she got her uniform out then went over to her laptop and turned it on.

She had loads of unread messages on both Youtube and Facebook. Emma was horrorfied at what all these messages said. She wiped away the tears that were starting to slide down her face and slammed the laptop shut. Emma was feeling really sick now she didnt want to go to school what would happen to her.

Lauren and Madi came running up the stairs.

"I thought you said you was getting ready?"Madi asked.

"I really dont feel well."Emma said.

"Whats wrong babe?"Lauren asked.

"I just dont feel ready to go back."Emma said looking down at the floor.

"Em its going to be ok you know."Madi said.

Emma just ran out into the bathroom.

"I think we should tell Sian."Lauren said.

"Yeah."Madi said getting up.

Madi went to Sian's bedroom and knocked on the door.

"Come in."She said.

"Sian theres something wrong with Emma."Madi said.

"What do you mean?"Sian asked.

"Well me and Lauren went in and she was just sat there and then she said that she doesnt feel well then she said that she doesnt feel ready to go back then when I said everything will be ok she ran out to the bathroom."Madi said.

"Ok thankyou for telling me I will go and see her."Sian said.

Sian knocked on the bathroom door.

"Emma Madi tells me you dont want to go back today can we talk?"Sian asked.

Emma unlocked the door. Her eyes were all red and swollen. Sian pulled her into a hug.

"Its all going to be ok."Sian said.

"No no its not."Emma sobbed.


	20. Chapter 20

Sian sat Emma down on her bed.

"What do you mean it wont be ok?"Sian asked.

"All those horrible messages."Emma sobbed.

"What horrible messages?"Sian asked.

"The ones on youtube and facebook."Emma sobbed.

"Show me."Sian said.

Emma stood up went over to her laptop and turned it went and stood behind her.

She logged onto youtube first.

"I made youtube video's to try and help over people."Emma said.

"How can anyone say a thing like that."Sian said reading through all the messages.

"It gets worse."Emma cried.

She then logged on to facebook. She showed Sian all the events people had set up to smash her face in. A new event had popped up since Emma had last looked on it was another event to hurt Emma but it wasnt set up by a total stranger it was set up by someone from school.

"Right Emma we are going to school we are going to sort this out now before it gets worse dont worry no one will touch you. Now you go and get ready then we will go."Sian said.


	21. Chapter 21

**Sorry I havent updated for a while been very busy with getting my GCSE's and things hope to update it a bit more regular. Thanks to everyone thats reading it and thankyou to the reviews and I will be doing a micheal/Emma scene soon.**

Sian had already rang up Micheal to tell him all about the hate Emma had been getting on facebook and youtube and how people had said they were going to come up to school for her. He had told Sian to print off all the nasty messages and bring them with them.

It was still very early in the morning. Sian and Emma arrived at school and were met by Micheal in the yard.

"Hi did you bring the copies?"Micheal asked Sian.

"Yes here they are."Sian said handing them over to him.

"Lets look at them in my office."He said.

All three of them made there way to his office. When they arrived Micheal sat down in his chair while Sian and Emma sat across from him.

"Emma how long have you been getting all of these messages?"He asked.

"For aslong as I can remember but they have got worse since you know."Emma said.

Micheal looked at all of the messages that Sian had printed out.

"Im absolutly discussed at all these horrible messages I dont no how anyone can write things like this. We will get this sorted for you dont you worry and no one is going to touch you."Micheal said.

"Micheal maybe Emma should stay with me all day so that we can keep an eye on her." Sian said.

"Yeah maybe that will be better just for today anyway. Im going to speak to Rihannon today and she will be punished. Emma I promise you that I will get all of this sorted and if you get anymore messages at all then you need to tell us then we can make them all go away." Micheal said.

"Yes sir."Emma said.

Emma and Sian left Micheals office.

"Emma, you arent worried about today are you? It being your first day back and everything after what happened."Sian asked.

"No im fine I need to get back into a normal routine I know that I will never be fully healed after what I did but I need to get on with things."Emma said.

"Ok, well lets go and get some work from the other teachers you have today but you would have me anyway for two hours this morning."Sian said.

They went and collected the work from the other teachers she would have normal on Monday. All the teachers were glad that Emma was back and fine and they got informed about all the hate Emma was getting.

Emma was in Sians science lab helping Sian set up for the experiment that they were going to do today.


	22. Chapter 22

**Sorry its been ages since I uploaded i've just started college so its been a bit hectic hope you enjoy.**

The bell went for first lesson. Everyone trailed into Mrs Diamonds class. Madi and Lauren went and sat down next to Emma.

"Emma are you ok?" Madi asked.

"Yeah I will be."Emma said.

"Im really sorry that you've got all that hate on the computer and I wont let anyone touch you."Lauren said.

"Thanks you two are real mates."Emma said smiling at them.

It was the first time that she had really smiled this morning and it made her feel just that little bit better knowing she had her two best mates looking out for her.

The first two hours flew by and it was soon time for break.

" Emma are you coming?" Madi asked.

" Sorry Madi Emma's staying here with me all day."Sian said.

"Ok well we will come and see you at dinner yeah."Madi said.

"Yeah i'd like that."Emma said.

Madi and Lauren left the classroom and went on there break leaving Emma with Sian.

"So what work are you going to do next lesson?" Sian asked Emma.

"Music I like Music."Emma said smiling.

"Thats good and Mr Wilding told me that you are a very good musicain."Sian said.

"Yeah thats the only thing that you know helped me when was down."Emma said.

"Yeah its good that you enjoy something so much, Im just going to see Mr Bryne you will be ok for a few minutes wont you?"Sain said.

"Yeah I will be fine. Emma said smiling at Sian.

Emma really liked Sian she had helped her so much with everything thats been happening and Emma had finally found someone that she actually looks up to and opened up to since her mum passed.

Emma was deep in thought when she heard the door open.

"That was quick."Emma said looking up. She then realised that it wasnt Sian but Rihannon.

"You bitch, why did you snitch on me, grassing me up to the head im in serious trouble because of you, I only said all of that shit because thats what you deserve I mean look at you your not ment for this world your an embarressment, look at all the scars you have its just discusting and sick and you deserve everything you get!"Rihannon yelled.

"SHUT UP, just shut up you have no idea how i've felt and how much I wanted to not be here but dont dare bring my scars into this. Yeah ok you think they are discusting and sick well I dont I think they are beautiful because they show the battles i've had to fight with myself and yeah I didnt win because they are there but I can slowly decrease my scars and that will prove that i've overcome my battle. I dont care who you've got waiting for me anymore because I know im better than you lot put together so go ahead hurt me do whatever you came here to do but if you must know you hitting me or punching me wont bother me at all especially with everything i've done to myself a little punch will be nothing."Emma shouted.

Rihannon was shocked she didnt expect a reaction like that she didnt no how to react to what Emma had just said.

"Rihannon what are you doing in here? Emma she hasnt hurt you has she? Sian said comign with Micheal.

"No she didnt miss."Emma said.

" I thought I had made it quite clear Rihannon that you get your stuff together and leave can I make it anymore clearer."Micheal said.

"I was just leaving."Rihannon said and walked out of the classroom.

Sian and Micheal went over to wear Emma was stood.

"You ok?"Sian asked.

"Yeah im fine."Emma said hugging Sian.

"What exactly did she say to you?"Micheal asked.

"Just that she thought I didnt deserve to be here and that im sick and discusting because of what I do and that I deserve everything I get."Emma said.

"Well she's wrong you do deserve to be here and don't listen to them words because you are none of them." Micheal said.

"thanks." Emma said.


	23. Chapter 23

_**Sorry I havent uploaded for ages ive had so much work recently hopefully I will have time to write a lot more soon.**_

Nothing happened for the rest of the day to Emma. She was so relieved she expected to be beat up but to be honest she hadnt been left on her own at all today. She was either with Sian or with Madi and Lauren.

"Who fancies pasta?" Sian said walking into the living room.

"me." Emma said.

"Me." Madi said aswell.

"Okay well i'll sort it out and then we can eat and watch Mean girls you like the sound of that?"Sian said.

The two girls looked at each other and said together "Yeah."

Sian was happier that Emma seemed brighter in herself since they sorted it out. She felt like Emma was her own daughter.

They all ate the pasta while mean girls was on. They really enjoyed just having some girl time while Zak was at his friends house.

"Sian can I just say thanks for everything you've been really good to me and its felt like my mum's back no one can replace her but being here has really helped me." Emma said.

"It's nothing Emma i'm so glad that i've helped you and i'd do it over and over again if it ment that you was happier and I would never try and take your mum's place because she was your mum ."Sian said.

"You both have made me so much happier I never thought i'd be happy, all I thought about was dying or cutting but not now I don't, I think about things like what i'm having for tea or whats on tv or what lessons i've got tommorow I feel normal now. I mean I will always have my scars and I will always be vulnerable to relapsing but my scars are part of me and i'm proud of them because like I said to Rihannon they show that i've overcome a battle." Emma said.

"Im so happy your living here and to be honest I love you for who you are I dont care what you've done in the past or what you might do in the future im just glad that i'm a part of making you happier." Madi said hugging Emma.


	24. Chapter 24

Sorry for the massive delay I know I havent updated since last year i've just had so much on hopefully you will all still want to read this please give me feedback. Again im sorry for not uploading regular.

Two weeks passed. Emma still didn't know what to do with the letters she had wrote for her dad. She didn't know if he was at home or if he had moved somewhere else till he got sorted out. Emma really did miss him even though he had treated her like shit and made her want to die she still loved him, he was her dad after all.

It was nearly Emma's birthday 4 days. She was going to be 16 she couldn't wait but she really didn't know if she would get a card from her dad. Madi and sian was planning a suprise birthday party to make sure the Emma had a really good time.

School was ok for Emma even though people said some nasty things to her in the corridors every now and then. Kids can be cruel though. Especially if they know about things that have happened in your past. Emma kept a smile on her face the all time and kept madi away from them because she wanted to slap everyone of them. But as Emma told them its my past I can't change them so go ahead say things. That usually shut them up.

It was a wednesday morning now. Emma really couldn't be bothered today she had a cold and just thinking about having double science with sian bored her even came in to the girls bedroom "Come on you two you need to get up and remember bring your all your science coursework."Sian started muttering on about how after they had all given in the coursework they were going to learn about stem cells. Madi and Emma looked at each other and groaned how could sian find science exciting they were thinking.

They finally managed to drag themselves out of bed and down stairs for some coco pops.

"Come on you two your going to make us all late if you arent ready in 10 minutes me and Zak are setting off without you." Sian said. You could tell she was in a good mood couldnt you.

10 minutes came and went and the girls were still trying to put there makeup on so like Sian had said they had gone without them.

"Thats so unfair, just because she gets up well early and doesnt have to put make up on she leaves us." Madi complained.

"I know tell me about it and its ok for Zak he just has to put his uniform on then he's ready." Emma said.

They set off 20 minutes later and were going to walk as they didnt have any other option.

"I cant wait till I can learn how to drive." Madi said as it was pouring down with rain.

"You'd get road rage." Emma said laughing.

"ME ROAD RAGE NAHH not a chance." Madi said laughing.

They started pushing each other and Madi slightly over did it. Emma ended up on the floor.

"OOWWW" Emma cried.

"Come on you wuss we are already late Sian is going to kill us." Madi said.

"I cant stand up."Emma said.

"Stop pulling my leg give us your hands."Madi said.

"Oww my ankle," Emma said still on the floor.

Madi tried getting her up several times but her ankle had moved and it looked very weird.

"Its no good Emma im going to have to ring an ambulance." Madi said getting out her phone.


End file.
